Overcoming a Phobia
- In This Quick Guide:
- Systematic Desensitization Therapy
- Cognitive Behavior Therapy
- Knowledge is Power
Specific phobias are relatively easy to treat. Most people can eliminate, or at least greatly reduce, a phobia with modern therapy methods. Even better news is that these treatments aren’t all that complicated. If you take them step-by-step, you can often reduce a phobia in a fairly short period of time—even without professional help.
Systematic Desensitization Therapy
The core of systematic desensitization therapy is that a person becomes less emotionally reactive (or sensitive) to the things they fear by systematic exposure to the feared object or situation. In addition, the treatment involves practicing a different, calmer emotional reaction whenever they are exposed to the things they fear.
In other words, if you learn to relax when you’re around those horses, riding in the car, or looking down from that high space, you’ll gradually have more and more experiences of being calm in the face of your phobia and will generally melt the phobia away.
Cognitive Behavior Therapy
Cognitive behavior therapy (or CBT) is the field of therapy that combines behavioral techniques, such as systematic desensitization, with newer techniques that involve working with the thoughts you have about a fear.
In CBT you learn that the things you think, say to yourself, or imagine, are in fact under your voluntary control. With practice, you can make dramatic changes in your mental landscape.
There are many approaches to doing CBT, but the basic idea is to learn to identify your thoughts and to take control of them. If you think differently, you’ll feel different.
The steps, in brief, are:
- Make a list of every thought, fear, or image you have of the phobia situation.
- For each item on the list, write out answers to these three questions:
- What is my evidence that this is actually true? (Are snakes really all over my yard, waiting to lunge at me? Does that bridge collapse often? Has it ever collapsed before? Are the odds of a dog biting me on the park trail very high?)
- What are some other possibilities besides the most awful one I’ve been imagining? (I might not see a snake in the yard all summer; besides, they’re more scared of me than I am of them! The bridge could last 500 more years. If I do see a dog, it’ll be on a leash and won’t get near me anyway.)
- If the worst is true, how will I cope? (I’d do first aid and call 911—they know how to treat snakebites and I’ll be fine. If a bridge collapses, I can learn how to escape a car in the water. If a dog bites, I’ll report it to the police and see the doctor.)
This exercise is really a kind of fishing expedition. Your goal is to come up with some things you can focus on that trigger less fear than the thoughts you’ve been having.
Usually, if done patiently a few times, you should be able to come up with at least one or two different ways to think about the thing you fear.
Once you have some more positive thoughts or images about your feared object or situation, spend some practice time focusing on these rosier possibilities. Write them down in a notebook and review them daily. Write out new stories about the situations you fear—stories in which things work out just fine. Reread and rewrite those stories, imagining yourself managing things better than you had expected.
Most of the time, life is full of self-fulfilling prophecies. Using this kind of cognitive approach, you deliberately rewrite the story of your fears until they may be fears no more. If you combine this cognitive part with the behavioral part of being exposed to the feared object (using the gradual approach described above in the desensitization section), you will be combining two powerful approaches to fear reduction.
Knowledge is Power
Many phobias may start or be made worse if you freeze up in a new or scary situation. The best solution to this is to deliberately develop knowledge and competence in this new situation. For instance, if you are unsure how to deal with dogs, it’s easy to find information on the best ways to approach a dog. Look it up online or find a friend or animal trainer who can help you learn these skills.
Whether it’s knowing how to navigate in a foreign country, ride a bike, or make a speech, you can develop new skills that will help you keep your fears in check.
Make a list of all the things you should know about a new adventure or situation. If you’re traveling to a new country, get some travel guides and study them. Learn some of the language. Find someone to go with, or make a list of the sources of information, resources, and help you’ll need. If it’s getting on horses that spooks you, find a riding instructor and ask her or him to help you get used to being around horses.
The more active you are in learning about the feared situation, the better you’ll cope and the less fear you’ll feel.
From The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Phobias by Gregory P. Korgeski, Ph.D.
