Finding a Church That’s Right for You
- In This Quick Guide:
- Identifying Your Needs
- Prioritizing Your List
- Finding the Best Choice
Whether you’re looking for religious guidance, spiritual counseling, regular opportunities to worship, or a more active social life, if you are going to choose a church, it’s important that you find the right one. Finding the right church can be more challenging than merely locating a congregation within your denomination, but a few simple guidelines can simplify your search.
Identifying Your Needs
The way to begin your search for a religious “home” is to draw up a list of all the things you need from a church, mosque, synagogue, or other house of worship. Begin by asking yourself questions such as these:
- Do you need to pray more or worship more?
- Do you need religious study?
- Do you need emotional support or spiritual counseling?
- Do you need a variety of social activities?
- Are you interested in evangelizing or becoming involved in community outreach services?
- Do you need to worship close to where you live?
If you have a spouse and/or children, remember to include their needs on your list, as well:
- Have a frank discussion with your spouse to identify what he or she is looking for in a church.
- If your kids are too young to figure out these kinds of questions, your later visits and discussions might help them identify their preferences.
Prioritizing Your List
Now it’s time to prioritize your list, to find out which of your needs are “must haves” and which are negotiable. These steps can simplify the process:
- Assign a ranking to each of your needs; for example, numbering your most important need as 1, next most important as 2, and so on.
- If you’ll be attending with family, have them rank their needs the same way, and then “meld” your lists.
- Now, review the rankings. The needs at the top of your list are non-negotiable. The church you choose to attend should absolutely meet your (and each family member’s) top non-negotiable need, as many of your other highly non-negotiable needs as possible, and some of your negotiable needs.
Finding the Best Choice
With your prioritized list in hand, you’re ready to begin your search for a church. Here are some tips to simplify the process:
- Look through your local listings or ask friends or neighbors to help you find churches that might fit your prioritized needs and interests.
- Choose at least three different places of worship for further study, so that you and your family will have options to compare and choose from.
- Plan on visiting each of the churches a few times before you make your choice—a single visit really won’t give you a full understanding of what the officials, services, and congregation are like.
- Pick up any literature available in the lobby or vestibule of the places you visit. Not only will they describe active programs and events, but they’ll give you a good feel for the nature of the religious organization you’re considering.
- If you need more information, contact the church officials or staff to discuss your questions, by phone or in a short face-to-face meeting.
- If your children will attend the church, make sure that the children’s programming is appropriate for their ages and interests.
- Weigh the findings of your visit against your prioritized list of needs, to be certain that your choice is based on careful consideration, not impulse. Be prepared to negotiate and compromise with family members.
Choosing a church takes some time and effort, but those are good investments in your future. Your place of worship represents so much more than a chapel, a religious denomination, or a congregation of people; it is your spiritual home, your place for religious counseling and guidance, a family retreat, and an active part of your social life. By all means use prayer to help you in your quest, but don’t forget to follow the simple steps outlined here to find the church that’s right for you.
